A society like ours make seeing households with 7 children and above as the norm. Especially if the family in question wanted a particular gender which in most cases are male children, the number of children gotten in their quest is excused because they finally got their dream. I mostly don’t have an issue with that. What I find problematic is that doing this while in poverty with the excuse that the children will become rich or that God will take care of them, so the parents drop children like raindrops on a rainy day waiting for the children to grow up and lift them out of poverty. However, we see thousands of these children every day, prancing the streets, missing the fundamental requirements of a child.
I understand that plans could be made and another thing occurs, however, I still find it irresponsible when the children are above a certain number and those elaborate plans could not cater for at least half of the children birthed. In most parts of Africa, there are no social benefits to cater for having large families so this sets the child or children up to continue in poverty without any intervention.
In the olden days, large families indicated more labour that aids the production of the family and extending the family’s legacy but this is not the olden days and what legacy do you want to leave for a child who is primarily hungry.
Changing this perspective will take a lot of work because we are inherently obsessed with procreating and sustaining our lineage. That is why we only ask a new couple when a child is coming rather than the many other questions relevant to marriage.
Some people even marry solely because they feel that are ready to have a mini-me without guaranteeing that they are financially, physically, spiritually and emotionally ready to raise a child. Frankly, it is okay to prioritize having a child or two at a later time and giving them the best you possibly can than pumping out children and not actively engaging your God-given brain because you feel it will sort out of work out and they just have to be rich someday for you to reap the rewards of your effortless labours.
In fact, we need to start with not shaming people because they don’t want to have children. Before you have one, think of the children suffering because of the circumstances they are in and plan for the future of the child.
*The tweets are screenshots from Twitter, I do not own them.
*The images are from Unsplash, I do not own them.